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One-Liners

22 One-Line Insults

A collection of some of the best insults and comebacks throughout history. A member of Parliament to Disraeli: “Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.”“That depends, Sir,” said Disraeli, “whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.” “He had delusions of adequacy .”-Walter Kerr “He has all the virtues […]

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One-Liners

Accountant Humor

Poking Fun At Accountants What’s the definition of an accountant? Someone who solves a problem you didn’t know you had in a way you don’t understand. What does an accountant use for birth control? His personality. When does a person decide to become an accountant? When he realizes he doesn’t have the charisma to sell […]

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One-Liners

Funny Definitions

Very funny alternative definitions of words These funny definitions are better than the ones found in your standard dictionary. Use them also to amuse your friends and family with your quick wit and original thinking. AMNESIA: Condition that enables a woman, who has gone through labor, to want more children. DUMBWAITER: One who asks if […]

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One-Liners

Henny Youngman

23 one-line jokes by Henny Youngman I played a great horse yesterday! It took seven horses to beat him. The horse I bet on was so slow, the jockey kept a diary of the trip. My horse’s jockey was hitting the horse. The horse turns around and says “Why are you hitting me, there is […]

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One-Liners

27 Jokes For Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day Jokesfor moms with a sense of humor 9 Things a mother would never say: “How on earth can you see the TV sitting so far back?” “Yeah, I used to skip school a lot, too.” “Just leave all the lights on … it makes the house look more cheery.” “Let me smell that […]

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One-Liners

Classic one-line Jewish jokes

5759 Year according to Jewish calendar 4696 Year according to Chinese calendar 1063 Total number of years that Jews went without Chinese food. Q: What’s the difference between a Rottweiler and a Jewish Mother? A: Eventually, the Rottweiler lets go. Q – What did the waiter ask the group of dining Jewish mothers? A – […]