Author: Leonard Kreicas
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How a policeman deals with a speeding driver at a stop sign
A guy speeds by a stop sign and gets pulled over by a policeman. Cop says, “License and registration please.” Guy says, “What for?” Cop says, “You didn’t come to a complete stop at the stop sign.” Guy says, “I slowed down, and no one was coming.” Cop says, “You still didn’t come to a…
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What couples do and say before and after a marriage
22 facts of Marriage What couples say and do before and after marriage. Before – You take my breath away. After – I feel like I’m suffocating. Before – Twice a night. After – Twice a month. Before – She loves the way I take control of a situation. After – She called me a…
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What does the lawyer offer the doctor after a car accident?
Why you should never accept help from a friendly lawyer. One day a doctor’s car and a lawyer’s car collided on an isolated country road. The lawyer, seeing that the doctor was a little shaken up, helped him from the car and offered him a drink from a bottle of whiskey the lawyer had in…
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32 auto insurance claims guaranteed to fail
A guide on what not to write on your auto insurance claim forms. I started to slow down but the traffic was more stationary than I thought. I pulled into a rest stop with smoke coming from under the hood. I realized the car was on fire so took my dog and smothered it with…
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Top ten things not to say at a funeral
What are the top 10 things you should not say at a funeral? What’s that smell? So who’s that sleeping in the box? I wouldn’t be caught dead in that outfit. I would have loaned him my good rope if I’d known what he was using it for! (to the widow) Now that you’re single,…
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You won’t believe what sports commentators said on live tv
The censors could not stop these comments before they went live on national sports telecasts with surprising results. Weightlifting commentator: “This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing.” Dressage commentator: “This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I…