150 Shuffled Thoughts

1. When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.
2. You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.
3. Unfortunately, my right to carry a gun doesn’t include the right to shoot the ignorant.
4. If life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, then let’s all get wasted together and have the time of our lives.
5. Why do drunk men miss the toilet? Who do sober men?
6. I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.
7. To the man who only has a hammer, everything he encounters begins to look like a nail.
8. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them.
9. It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid.
10. Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.
11.  People who use anti-aging creams must have the youngest-looking fingertips on earth.
12. You can’t have everything, where would you put it?
13. Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world’s population.
14. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.
15. Eat right. Stay fit. Die anyway.
16. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
17. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat drinking beer all day.
18. I’ll sleep when I’m dead.
19. My Mother Is a travel agent for guilt trips.
20. What we see depends on mainly what we look for.
21. I can’t go back to yesterday, because I was a different person then.
22. Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.
23. Thank you. We’re all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
24. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
25. To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me.
26. Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.
27. The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work.
28. A clever man commits no minor blunders.
29. At times I am amazed at how proportionally strong ants are, but then I remember I can still step on them.
30. My husband could have had any women he pleased—he just couldn’t please any!

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