Finally explanations of the hidden language of real estate ads, with real-life examples.
Memorize this list of terms used for homes and properties that need serious upgrades to make them livable.
- Sophisticated city living means: Next to a noisy bar
- Old World Charm means: Has some woodwork and needs cleaning
- Contemporary Feeling means: Has no woodwork or furnishings
- Close to lakes is the code for: Impossible to reach the street, except in summer
- Picturesque setting means: Abandoned cars and waist-high weeds in neighboring lots
- A wide-open floor plan means: the previous owner removed supporting walls
- Updated kitchen means: The sink no longer overflows
- Security system means: Neighbor has a mean dog
- Needs TLC means: Major structural damage
- Motivated seller means: Could not sell the home for 10 years
- Convenient location means: Next to freeway entrance ramp
- Mint condition means: Mouthwash spilled on the carpet
- Neutral decor means: No mural of nudes or Elvis
- Move-in condition means: Front door missing
- Cozy means: Each room is the size of a closet
- Lower-level family room means: Ping-pong table covers sewer opening
- Light, open spaces mean: Holes in walls and missing insulation
- Outstanding means: Sticks out like a sore thumb in this neighborhood
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