Author: Leonard Kreicas
-
Why I Fired My Secretary
Two weeks ago was my 45th birthday, and I wasn’t feeling too hot that morning anyway. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say “Happy Birthday,” and probably have a present for me. She didn’t even say “Good Morning,” let alone any “Happy Birthday.” I thought, “Well, that’s wives for you.…
-
Silly Beach Rules
No way to have a good time at the beach NO DOGS NO BICYCLES NO SWIMMING
-
Farmer Feels Frisky
Young farmer Jones made an appointment with the family doctor regarding sexual problems he was having with his wife. “Now listen, Matt,” the doctor advised, “you have to be more loving to your wife. Give her lots of hugs and kisses. Show her how much you care.” “Well, I’ll do the best I can,” he…
-
Redneck Medical Terms
Artery: The study of paintings Bacteria: Back door to cafeteria Barium: What doctors do when patients die Benign: What you be after you be eight Cesarean Section: A neighborhood in Rome Catscan: Searching for Kitty Cauterize: Made eye contact with her Colic: A sheep dog Coma: A punctuation mark D&C: Where Washington is Dilate: To…
-
Triple Scotch At The Bar
A guy walks into a bar and orders a triple scotch. The bartender pours him the drink and the guy downs it in one gulp. “Wow,” says the bartender, “Something bad must have happened.” Yeah it did, he said. “I came home early today, went up to the bedroom, and found my wife having sex…
-
Distracted Minister
The minister of a small congregation was about to start his sermon when he noticed a young woman in the front row, wearing a tight dress barely concealing her breasts. He couldn’t concentrate on his message to the flock, so he dismissed the service and asked to speak to the woman after everyone else left…