Tag: police
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21 Things Not To Say To A Police Officer
I can’t reach my license unless you hold my beer. Sorry officer, I didn’t realize my radar detector wasn’t plugged in. Aren’t you the guy from the Village People? Hey, you must’ve been doin’ about 125 mph to keep up with me! Good job! I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition…
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Funny Excuse For Driver Not Wearing Eyeglasses
A policeman stops a driver and asks for her driver’s license. The cop points out, “Miss, your license says that you should be wearing glasses.” The woman innocently answered, “Well, I have contacts.” The policeman angrily said, “I don’t care who you know! You’re getting a ticket!” Comedian gives the backstory Have you ever had…
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8 Traffic Cop Quotes Will Serve As a Warning
“If you run, you’ll only go to jail tired.” “The handcuffs are tight because they’re new. They’ll stretch out after you wear them awhile.” “So, you don’t know how fast you were going. I guess that means I can write anything I want on the ticket, huh?” “The answer to this last question will determine…
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Funny story about Fred Dingaling
A local law enforcement officer stopped a car for traveling faster than the posted speed limit. Since he’s in a good mood that day he decides to give the poor fellow a break and write him out a warning instead of a ticket. So, he asks the man his name. “Fred,” he replies. “Fred what?”…
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Secret of Fishing
No one in this town could catch any fish except this one man. The game warden asked him how he did it so the man told the game warden that he would take him fishing the next day. Once they got to the middle of the lake the man took out a stick of dynamite,…
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Cat Burglar
Cat burglar is caught in the act and held at gunpoint.