Just Plain Dumb

Some just plain dumb phrases

1. If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
2. If people from Poland are called “Poles,” why aren’t people from Holland called “Holes?
3. “When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
4. Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
5. Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
6. If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible?
7. Why isn’t 11 pronounced onety one?
8. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
9. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?
10. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
11. Why do women wear evening gowns to nightclubs? Shouldn’t they be wearing night gowns?
12. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
13. When someone asks you, “A penny for your thoughts,” and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?
14. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
15. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It’s just stale bread to begin with.
16. If you mixed vodka with orange juice and milk of magnesia, would you get a Phillips Screwdriver?
17. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a “whack”?
18. “I am” is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that “I do” is the longest sentence?
19. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn’t it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked and dry cleaners depressed?
20. Do Roman paramedics refer to IV’s as “4’s”?
21. Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe them, but if they tell you that a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?