- LOG ON: Making a wood stove hot
- LOG OFF: Don’t add no more wood
- MONITOR: Keeping an eye on the woodstove
- DOWNLOAD: Gittin the farwood off the truck
- MEGA HERTZ: When ya drop the farwood on your foot
- RAM: That thar thing whut splits the farwood
- HARD DRIVE: Gitting home in the winter time
- WINDOWS: Whut to shut when it’s cold outside
- SCREEN: Whut to shut when it’s blak fly season
- BYTE: Whut dem dang flies do
- CHIP: Munchies fer the TV
- MICRO CHIP: Whut’s in the bottom of the munchie bag
- MODEM: Whatcha do to the hay fields
- DOT MATRIX: Old Dan Matrix’s wife
- LAPTOP: Whar the kitty sleeps
- KEYBOARD: Whar you hang the dang truck keys
- SOFTWARE: Them dang plastic forks and knifes
- MOUSE: What eats the grain in the barn
- MOUSE PAD: That’s hippie talk fer the mouse hole
- MAINFRAME: Holds up the barn roof
- PORT: Fancy Flatlander wine
- ENTER: Northerner talk fer, “C’Mon in y’all”
- CLICK: Whut you hear when you cock your gun
- DOUBLE CLICK: When the dang gun don’t far when you pull the trigger
- REBOOT: Whut you have to do right before bedtime when you forgot to use the outhouse.
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Computer Talk For Redneck
How to translate computer terms so rednecks understand them. Computer literacy for rednecks.