My rant on a clueless woman driver:
Driving to the office this morning on the highway, I looked over to my left and there was this idiotic woman in a brand new Mercedes speeding at 65 miles per hour with her face up next to the rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner.
I looked away for a couple seconds and when I looked back she was halfway over in my lane, still working on her forsaken makeup.
It scared me (I’m a man) so bad that I dropped my electric shaver, which knocked the doughnut out of my other hand.
In all the confusion of trying to straighten out my car using my knees against the steering wheel, my cell phone got knocked away from my ear.
It fell into the coffee between my legs, splashed and burned Big Jim and the Twins, ruined the phone and disconnected an important call.
All because of that clueless woman driver not paying attention to her driving!