Category: Lists
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Innocent Church Bloopers
The Rev. Andersen spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience. The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church. The Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10am. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S.…
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Newspaper Profiles
The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the country. The New York Times is read by people who think they run the country. The Washington Post is read by people who think they ought to run the country. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the…
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Physical Exercise Alternatives
Physical exercise is good for you. I know that I should do it daily, but my body doesn’t want me to do too much, so I have worked out this program of 25 strenuous activities that do not require physical exercise. You are invited to use my program without charge. Beating around the bush Jumping…
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Brief English Dictionary Written By A Dog
BATH This is a process by which the humans drench the floor, walls and themselves. You can help by shaking vigorously and frequently. BICYCLES Two-wheeled exercise machines, invented for dogs to control body fat. To get maximum aerobic benefit, you must hide behind a bush and dash out, bark loudly and run alongside for a…
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Funny How Things Work Out
Sometimes you will cry and no one will see your tears… Sometimes you will laugh and no one will see you smile… Sometimes you will fear and no one will see you shudder… Sometimes you will lie and no one will catch you up… Sometimes you will fall and no one sees you struggle… Sometimes…
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Man’s Guide To Outdoor Grilling
There is the only type of outdoor grilling a “real” man will do. When a man volunteers to do such cooking, the following are step-by-step instructions for “The Real Man’s Guide To Grilling.” The woman goes to the store. The woman fixes the salad, vegetables, and dessert. The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places…