Category: Lists
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Ideal Man List at 22 and 42
Ideal Man For A Woman Original List (at age 22) Handsome Charming A financial success A caring listener Witty A body like Adonis Dresses with style Appreciates the finer things in life Full of thoughtful surprises An imaginative and romantic lover Revised List (at age 42) Not too ugly Doesn’t belch or scratch in public…
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Dating Definitions
LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT….. what occurs when two extremely horny, but not entirely choosy people meet. DATING….. the process of spending enormous amounts of money, time and energy to get better acquainted with a person whom you don’t especially like in the present and will learn to like a lot less in the future. BIRTH…
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Never Read Disclaimers
Disclaimers seem to be everywhere, but how many do you take seriously? Pick your favorites among the 82 on the list below. This product is meant for educational purposes only. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead is purely coincidental. Void where prohibited. Some assembly required. Batteries not included. Contents may settle during shipment.…
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Funny Kitchen List
A humorous kitchen list written to discourage any attempt to do kitchen duty. Kitchen closed for today. Reservations only I’m waiting for a: Food Network inspiration I’m creative. You can’t expect me to be neat too. This isn’t Home Sweet Home. Live with it Ring Bell for Maid Service. If no answer, do it yourself.…
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Lessons From Mama
My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE: “If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside – I just finished cleaning!” My mother taught me RELIGION: “You better pray that will come out of the carpet.” My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL: “If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to…
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Random Thoughts
Never raise your hands to your kids: it leaves your groin unprotected. I’m not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain. I am in shape. Round’s a shape… I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific. The reason most people play golf is to wear clothes they would…