Meaning Of Life:
Point-by-Point Explanation
Humorous thoughts on why you can never win the game of life
- I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow’s not looking good either.
- I love deadlines. I especially love the swooshing sound they make as they go flying by.
- Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?
- If I explained life to you, your brain would explode.
- Someday we’ll look back on this and plow into a parked car.
- My reality check bounced.
- Everybody is a weirdo to somebody else.
- Tell me what you need, and I’ll tell you how to get along without it.
- I don’t suffer from stress – I’m a carrier.
- There are very few personal problems that cannot be solved through a suitable application of high explosives.
- You’re slower than turtles stampeding through peanut butter!
- I don’t have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
- Accept that some days you’re the pigeon, and others you’re the statue.
- Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If he isn’t there the first time you need him, chances are you won’t be needing him again.
- Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and thought to myself – “Where the heck is the ceiling?”
- On the keyboard of life explained, always keep one finger on the escape key.
- Don’t meddle in the affairs of dragons, because you’re crunchy and taste good with ketchup.
And there you have it! Now you understand the meaning of life.