How men behave in public urinals

Excitable: Shorts half twisted around, can’t find hole, rips shorts.

Sociable: Joins friends in pee, whether he has to go or not.

Nosey: Looks into the next urinal to see how the other guy is fixed.

Cross-eyed: Looks into urinal on left, pees into one in center.

Timid: Can’t urinate if someone else is watching, flushes urinal anyway.

Indifferent: If all urinals are being used, pees in sink.

Clever: No hands. Shows off by fixing tie, looks around, pees on floor.

Worried: Is not sure of what he has been doing, makes a quick inspection.

Frivolous: Plays stream up and down and across urinal, tries to hit fly.

Absentminded: Opens vest, pulls out tie, pees in pants.

Disgusted: Stands for a while, gives up, walks away.

Sneaky: Farts silently while peeing, acts very innocent, knows that the man in the next stall will be blamed.

Childish: Leaks directly into the urinal bottom, likes to watch bubbles.

Patient: Stands very close for a long time waiting, reads newspaper with free hand.

Efficient: Waits until he has to take a crap, then does both.

Tough: Bangs dong against urinal to dry it.

Fat: Has to stand back to take a long blind shot, misses, pees in shoe.

Little: Stands on box, falls in.

Drunk: Holds left thumb in right hand, pees in pants.

Impatient: Always in a hurry, pees down back of guy ahead of him.

Withdrawn: Places feet in urinal, pees down leg so no one hears.

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