Author: Leonard Kreicas
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How men behave in public urinals
Excitable: Shorts half twisted around, can’t find hole, rips shorts. Sociable: Joins friends in pee, whether he has to go or not. Nosey: Looks into the next urinal to see how the other guy is fixed. Cross-eyed: Looks into urinal on left, pees into one in center. Timid: Can’t urinate if someone else is watching,…
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Strange ways to stop missionaries from entering home
A chalk outline of a human body on the sidewalk, and a few copies of The Watchtower scattered around… My mother (a second-generation atheist) used to say (in a very sweet voice): “I’m sorry, I don’t give a damn about Jesus.” Worked every time. The missionaries just backed off the porch in slack-jawed, bug-eyed disbelief.…
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Female peacocks not impressed by male peacock’s feathers
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When never is better than being late.
Ever wonder why you get to work looking like crap? Here is the answer: Promise it will not happen again!
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Funny List Of Grammatical Oddities
Do these phrases make sense to you? If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented? If people from Poland are called “Poles,” why aren’t people from Holland called “Holes? “When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say? Why are a wise man and a wise…
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If Dogs Wrote Letters To God
Dear God, Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another? When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it the same old story? Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE…