Author: Leonard Kreicas

  • Doggie Dictionary

    LEASH: A strap which attaches to your collar, enabling you to lead your person where you want him/her to go. DOG BED: Any soft, clean surface, such as the white bedspread in the guest room or the newly upholstered couch in the living room. DROOL: Is what you do when your persons have food and…

  • Deathbed Wish

    Lying on his deathbed, the wealthy Mr. Harris was instructing his lawyer on last-minute changes in his will. “I wish to leave everything I own, stocks, bonds, property, art and money to my wife. However, there is one stipulation.” “And that is?” queried the lawyer. “In order to inherit, she must marry again within six…

  • Jockey Rides A Strange Horse

    A champion jockey is about to enter an important race on a new horse. The horse’s trainer meets him before the race and says, “All you have to remember with this horse is that every time you approach a jump, you have to shout, ‘ALLLLEEE OOOP!’ really loudly in the horse’s ear. Providing you do…

  • Change Grade Request Form

    Comprehensive cheat sheet of change grade request from a  student to a teacher. To: Professor____________________ From: __________________ I think my grade in your course, ___________________, should be changed from ____ to ____ for the following reasons: ____ The person who copied my paper made a higher grade than I did. ____ The person whose paper…

  • Did You Know

    Psychiatrists say that one of four people are mentally ill. Check three friends. If they’re OK, you’re it. Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. “Yes” is the answer. Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check. A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn. It has recently…

  • Speeding Blonde

    A blonde was speeding in a 35 mile per hour zone when a local police cruiser pulled her over and walked up to the car. The police officer also happened to be a blonde and he asked for the blonde’s driver’s license. The driver searched frantically in her purse for a while and finally said…