Texas Soldier

Texas soldier

A large group of Taliban soldiers are moving down a road when they hear a voice call from behind a sand dune.

“One Texas soldier is better than ten Taliban soldiers.”

The commander quickly sends ten of his best soldiers over the dune, and a gun-battle breaks out that continues for a few minutes.

Then silence ensues and a┬ávoice calls out: “One Texas soldier is better than ten Taliban soldiers.”

Furious, the commander sends his next best one hundred troops over the dune and instantly a huge gunfight commences.

After ten minutes of intense fighting, again silence follows.

The Texan’s voice calls out again: “One Texas soldier is better than ten Taliban.”

The enraged commander musters one thousand fighters and sends them across the dune.

Cannons, rockets and machine gun fire ring out as a huge battle is fought. Then quiet.

Eventually one wounded Taliban fighter crawls back over the dune and with his dying words tells his commander: “Don’t send any more men. It’s a trap. There’s two of them.”

Funny Military Quotes

Military Quotes Wit and Wisdom

Timeless quotes about the military that have almost become cliches. Read them and chuckle.

“If you see a bomb technician running, follow him.”
– USAF Ammo Troop

bomb technician at work
bomb technician gives a warning notice

“Friendly fire – isn’t”

“Tracers work both ways.”
– U.S. Army Ordnance

“Never trade luck for skill.”

“If something hasn’t broken on your helicopter, it’s about to.”

“Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once.”

“Even with ammunition, the USAF is just another expensive flying club.”

“If the enemy is in range, so are you.”
– Infantry Journal

“It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed.”
– U.S. Air Force Manual

“Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons.”
– General MacArthur

“You, you, and you … Panic. The rest of you, come with me.”
– U.S. Marine Corp Gunnery Sgt.

“Five second fuses only last three seconds.”
– Infantry Journal

“Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.”
– Unknown Marine Recruit

“Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death, I Shall Fear No Evil. For I am at 80,000 Feet and Climbing.”
– Unknown source

“You’ve never been lost until you’ve been lost at Mach 3.”
– Paul F. Crickmore (test pilot)

“The only time you have too much fuel is when you’re on fire.”

“If the wings are traveling faster than the fuselage, it’s probably a helicopter — and therefore, unsafe.”

“When one engine fails on a twin-engine airplane you always have enough power left to get you to the scene of the crash.”

“What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots? If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies; If ATC screws up, … The pilot dies.”

The three most common expressions (or famous last words) in aviation are:

“Why is it doing that?”
“Where are we?”
And “Oh S…! ”

“Airspeed, altitude and brains. Two are always needed to successfully complete the flight.”

“Mankind has a perfect record in aviation; we never left one up there!”

“Flying the airplane is more important than radioing your plight to a person on the ground incapable of understanding or doing anything about it.”

“The Piper Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can just barely kill you.”
– Attributed to Max Stanley (Northrop test pilot)

“There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime.”
– Sign over squadron ops desk at Davis-Monthan AFB, AZ, 1970

“You know that your landing gear is up and locked when it takes full power to taxi to the terminal.”

As the test pilot climbs out of the experimental aircraft, having torn off the wings and tail in the crash landing, the crash truck arrives, the rescuer sees a bloodied pilot and asks “What happened?”
The pilot’s reply: “I don’t know, I just got here myself!”
– Attributed to Ray Crandell (Lockheed test pilot)