Tag: driving
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Bumper Stickers About Driving
Driving Lessons The Bumper Sticker Guide Forget world peace; visualize using your turn signal. If you believe in telepathy, think about honking. If you can read this, I’ve lost the trailer! Stoplights timed for 30 mph are also timed for 60 mph. Follow that car, Godzilla – and step on it! Don’t bother honking or…
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What happens when film producer loses his arm?
A film producer parks his brand new Porsche Carerra Cabriolet, and just as he swings the door open to get out, a truck speeds by and completely tears it off. The producer, ready to kill, grabs his cell phone, dials his assistant and tells her to dial 911 immediately. Soon a cop pulls up, but…
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What people do if they love Jesus
The wife of a Southern Baptist preacher talks to her Sunday school class about a wonderful religious experience that she had last week: The other day I went up to the local Christian book store where I saw a “Honk If You Love Jesus” bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I…
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Toyota Cowrolla
With the current gasoline prices so high, Toyota may soon unveil its newest model named the Cowrolla to capture this emerging market. According to reliable sources, the Cowrolla does not run on gasoline or diesel. It is a technological breakthrough in engine design using only biodegradable materials with low maintenance costs. To avoid any last…
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Speeding Blonde
A blonde was speeding in a 35 mile per hour zone when a local police cruiser pulled her over and walked up to the car. The police officer also happened to be a blonde and he asked for the blonde’s driver’s license. The driver searched frantically in her purse for a while and finally said…
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Clueless Woman Driver
My rant on a clueless woman driver: Driving to the office this morning on the highway, I looked over to my left and there was this idiotic woman in a brand new Mercedes speeding at 65 miles per hour with her face up next to the rear view mirror putting on her eyeliner. I looked…