Tag: dogs
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Intelligent Sheep Dog
A woman seated at the movies was surprised to find, sitting in the two adjacent seats, a man with his arm around a sheep dog. All through the movie, she noticed the dog watching the picture with apparent understanding snarling when the villain appeared, yelping happily at the funny parts. At the end of the…
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Expensive Veterinarian Bill
A woman brought a very limp parrot into a veterinary hospital. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, “I’m so sorry, Polly has passed away.” The distressed owner wailed,…
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Canine Pre-Wash Setting
A drinking buddy went to dinner at his friend’s house. The friend was a slob, but whatever. When they got out the chow the bud saw all the plates were dirty. Like they haven’t been washed or cleaned. Ever. “Are these dishes okay to use?” “They’re as clean as soap and water could get them.”…
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Russian-American Dogfight
The Americans and Russians, at the height of the arms race, realized that if they continued in the usual manner they were going to blow up the whole world. One day they sat down and decided to settle the whole dispute with one dogfight. They’d have five years to breed the best fighting dog in…
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Quick Relationship Quiz
A dog is truly a man’s best friend. If you don’t believe it, just try this experiment. Put your dog and your wife in the trunk of your car for an hour. When you open the trunk, who is really happy to see you?
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Dog Named Sex
I call mine “Sex.” He’s a great pal but he has caused me a great deal of embarrassment. When I went to the city hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like a license for Sex. He said, “I’d like one too.” Then I said, “But this is a dog.”…