Big List Of Lies

• The check’s in the mail.
• I’m from the government and I’m here to help you.
• I thought I already gave you that money I owed you.
• I promise I’ll pay you back next Friday.
• I’ve never been this drunk before.
• I’ll never get this drunk again.
• I’ve checked this email out, and it’s really not a hoax.
• Now we’re even.
• I’m fine.
• We found and fixed the last bug!
• The software will ship on schedule.
• It was as simple as that.
• It’s all your fault!
• I love you
• You don’t need to use a condom; I’m on the Pill.
• I don’t need to use a condom; I’ve had a vasectomy and tested negative for STDs.
• A representative of the government says…
• We’ll have the repairs on your car done by noon.
• Operator, my calling card number is…
• You look like you haven’t aged a day.
• No, I don’t think that outfit makes you look fat.
• This is what it will cost to repair your car.
• If elected, I promise…
• You’re going to love working here.
• I don’t know what you’re talking about.
• Nine out of ten people surveyed said…
• Please hold, and a customer service representative will be with you shortly.
• I’ll only take a minute of your time.
• Our cell phones will give you more freedom…
• 100% compatible with your existing equipment.
• !!Make Money Fast!!
• Lose all the weight you want!
• I’m being totally unbiased.
• I promise I’ll pull out in time.
• With all due respect…
• For your convenience…
• In order to serve you better…
• I’m planning to get a divorce so I can marry you.
• I’ll call you.
• I never meant to mislead you.
• My wife (husband) is okay with me seeing other people; s/he just doesn’t want to know about it.
• I’m not leaving you for him/her; I just need some space to think things through.
• This will only hurt a little.
• This will hurt me more than it does you.
• I’m doing this for your own good.
• It’s only for a little while…
• I didn’t mean any harm.
• Oh well, no harm done…
• It was an accident.
• I didn’t do it.
• I don’t know who did it.
• We are experiencing a peak level of call volume…
• Free Adult XXX Web Site!!!
• No obligation!
• You may already be a winner!
• This product was made in an environmentally friendly manner.
• I know it’s none of my business…
• I’m not trying to tell you what to do, but…
• This should be easy.
• To speak to a representative, press “9”.
• It’s nothing personal.
• This isn’t partisan politics; it’s for the good of the country.
• I’m not addicted; I can quit smoking any time I want.
• New and Improved!
• Trust me.
• That was special.

Additions welcome in comments