If you’re a bear, you get to hibernate.
You do nothing but sleep for six months.
I could deal with that.
Before you hibernate, you’re supposed to eat yourself stupid.
I could deal with that, too.
If you’re a mama bear, everyone knows you mean business.
You swat anyone who bothers your cubs.
If your cubs get out of line, you swat them too.
I could deal with that.
If you’re a bear, your man expects you to wake up growling.
He expects that you will have hairy legs and excess body fat.
I wanna be a bear.
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